seaCHELES.

sometimes it is hard to learn the lesson at hand. usually very independent, i have been learning how to give up some independence in order to learn how to truly appreciate what other people have to offer me. what i have noticed, and what i do not want to continue to do, is give up so much of myself to learn this lesson. this presents the bigger lesson that i really need to learn, finding balance.

i am usually an extreme person when it comes to being independent. before i found myself in the circumstance that i currently am in, i was very independent. i thought about what i wanted, acted on that, and reaped the benefits. but, now that i am unable to do so, i have found myself completely relying on someone else to get what i need, and want.

i am not happy with this at all. my voice is not one to be easily hushed, not even by myself. and, i am really trying to found out how i got to this point. somehow, i lost myself on account of trying to just go with things. it is not something i want to do anymore. i need balance. i want to learn how to be independent while maintaining appreciation for others who play a major role in my life. the first step i can take is to start really taking time for myself, doing what i enjoy doing and not doing what others are doing because i have to rely on them. more importantly, i need to recognize my options and stop only doing what seems easiest or most convenient for my situation. sometimes, in order to do what is best for self, we have to step outside of the easy way of doing things, and just do whatever is best, tailoring the small things to fit that choice.

{living everyday with the best intentions}